Earlier this year, my life changed in a very dramatic way, I became a widow after 36 years of marriage.. at the time, I thought my life was over..so much had happened in those 36 years, so much had happened in the last 8 years. After his passing, little changes started creeping back into my life, I was alone, bored, too much time on my hands, a friend-who had watched me go thru so much these last few months, convinced me, I was still alive and a viable human being, with a lot to give. I knew, I didn't want what I'd had before, there was something missing in our relationship, something I needed and craved..being so old school, my mind hadn't a clue as to what I needed..my friend did tho, she knew exactly what I needed and opened my eyes to this wonderful life.. I'm a control freak, my life must be just right, I've gotten away from the OCD of lining the spices up alphabetically, glasses lined up perfectly, now I'm a little messy, not so compulsive about my surroundings..or me..now I am exploring the submissive side of me, the part that lets go, gives completely of my own free will, my body, mind, soul and heart to another..we don't have fixed names for each other, I am his lady, i am his to use, tease, please, drive insane with want, need.. His to keep on the edge, the man that makes me complete - my g- a year ago, if there had been a picture of me around - you would see a housewife, no smiling eyes, rare laughter, no sexuality at all... today, my smile will light up your world, my sensuality will shock you to your core, my need, love, want-to touch and feel everything will amaze you-I am in a constant state of readiness, a constant state of flux, it just takes a thought-a brush-a word and I am his.. I am learning everyday about me-he teaches me that, shows me, frees me-he has shown me that I am beautiful, sensual, wanton, slutty, that I will do anything to please him-I love giving myself to him, submitting to his desires, because in the long run-they are my desires-he is just showing me the way.. je suis a toi, i am yours-please use me